“For this cause a man shall leave his father and mother; and shall cleave to his wife. And they two shall be in one flesh.”

In first century, Palestine was a patriarchal culture in which women had few rights. A man could divorce his wife, but a wife could not divorce her husband. According to the Torah, the principal grounds for divorce were infertility, infidelity and material or emotional neglect.

Over time, some Jewish scholars had interpreted the scriptures liberally to include an ever-expanding list of “legitimate” reasons for divorce. By Christ’s time, one school of thought said that a man could divorce his wife for any reason, even something as trivial as burning his evening meal. Another school of thought said that adultery was the only valid reason for divorce.

The Pharisees may have been trying to draw Jesus into this debate when they asked His opinion of divorce. But Christ surprised them by saying, “what God has joined together, let not man put asunder.”

In Jesus view, the ideal marriage was one in which two souls become consecrated to one another for life. To underscore His point, He cited the passage in Genesis which states, "For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh."

To appreciate why Jesus took such a strong stance on divorce, we need look no further than our own circle of friends. We all know someone who has experienced the heartache and headaches of divorce.

Today, nearly one out of three marriages ends in divorce, down from a peak rate of about 40% in the 1960s and 1970s. At the outset, a divorcing couple feels emotionally bereft and financially devastated by the way their lives are being torn asunder. For both parties, but especially women, divorce usually means a lowering of their standard of living. In the aftermath of divorce, single parents of limited means must somehow struggle to earn a living while fulfilling their responsibilities as homemakers. The challenge is exacerbated if the former spouse refuses to cooperate in the rearing of the children. But adults have coping skills that can help them through a divorce. Children are less fortunate.

The impact of divorce on children can be devastating, both psychologically and spiritually. To a child, divorce is scary, bewildering and menacing. Often, the children of divorce lose a parent, home, school and friends, all at the same time. In trying to make sense of what has happened, they may blame themselves for the break-up of the marriage, a traumatic blow to their self-esteem. Alternatively, they may fault one of their parents and feel pressured to choose sides. If one parent attacks the other, they may turn on the accuser and defend the one being criticized. In shuttling back and forth between parents every other weekend, they can become pawns in an ongoing battle between the former spouses. Eventually, the children may learn to play one parent against the other to get what they want. If the parent they’re living with starts to date someone, they may become rebellious.

As a result of their emotional conflicts, the children of divorce may have trouble concentrating on their studies, in which case, their schoolwork suffers. If unsupervised after school, they might drift into serious trouble. But the gravest consequence of divorce may be a loss of trust in any authority figure, and in particular, God.

Of course, many children of divorce manage to cope with their new reality and go on to enjoy successful lives, marriages and careers. Their faith remains strong, in spite of (or perhaps because of) what happened to their parents’ marriage. If the parent they’re living with remains strong in faith, there is a good chance that the children will remain strong in their faith, too.